Where Is Your Light Directing You Today?

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It’s perhaps enough that we ask ourselves what career path we want to choose and what our true passions are that we don’t need others asking us all the same unfortunate questions.There’s just too much pressure to know off hand what we’re going to be doing for the rest of our lives. Sure, the economy seems to be statistically doing just fine and jobs are being “created” by the ever accumulating problems of being human, but opportunity and money both seem scarce us. We’re all scared.

We never needed to label the things we loved doing and we certainly didn’t need the word “passion” to know it. Excuses are what these questions are. No one starts questioning what their “passions” are until they’ve gotten old enough to be scared they don’t have any.

Here are some other fun excuses we commonly make:

  • I’m raising children.
  • I’m in debt.
  • This passion thing isn’t going to pay.
  • I’m thirty years old and should be doing something serious with my life.

When we were children we never thought that one day we’d grow up, hold jobs and pay bills, but guess what happened? I speak for many others when I say we feel overcome by our own excuses everyday. Full of disappointment in ourselves. We hate to think it’s too late for something or worse–we were never good enough. Perhaps there is no use in telling everyone that we are all good enough for something and maybe there is no solution to this issue, but there is still one thing we can do to persist and try. Pretend to be the child you once were without setting aside the wisdom you’ve gained in adulthood.

I don’t recall when I started asking what my career is going to be but at some point we all did. Logically speaking, we know job security doesn’t exist but we still pine after it nonetheless. We’ve ended up making a lot of choices “just in case”.

Remember the last generation that pined after secure factory jobs? Decades later we are questioning why that was ever a desirable prospect. Pretty soon we’ll look back and think the same of our cushy corporate jobs under florescent lights. We have to work hard to make a job work for us, not the other way around.

I never thought about careers as a kid, just what I wanted to do. Later, when I actually began to think about careers, I thought much less about what I wanted to do. How ironic. I’ve counted the number of jobs I’ve had since I entered post secondary. Jobs, not careers. A lot of what I’ve done didn’t exist when I was a kid. Heck, some of the jobs out there right now didn’t exist even five years ago. So whenever I try to start planning a year ahead, I always end up guessing wrong. There is no helping what will lie ahead.

We all have a light within us that we’ve perhaps buried over the years. What path is your light illuminating today? Sometimes it directs us to experiences we’ve had before for reflection and others for our curious and creative desires. But it never points to meetings and the fact that our co-workers don’t like us.

Improve your life by dedicating a larger portion of your day to walking on the path your light shines upon. Maybe some days you can only give it 10 percent and perhaps you can give it your all on the weekends. As with all things in life, we can work towards improving this over the years.

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Hoarding Memories

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Does it make sense when I say: I really want change for improvement in life but continue to be a nostalgic hoarder of objects that remind me of the past? These days, I tend to consider myself as someone open to change and new things in my life. That wasn’t always the case. I remember leaving my first home of 10 years for a newer, more beautiful home. While I was incredibly excited about my new room, a part of me was devastated. I wanted to keep a grasp of the feeling of familiarity that my first home gave me so much that I vowed (as the naive ten-year-old I was) to one day move back there.

None of those thoughts ever made me realize that it was the people, friends, family –loved ones –that made empty objects seem like they held more significance than they deserved.

Like the little overpriced restaurant at the street corner of my former home, it still holds an unexplained amount of significance. I lived in the area during my earliest, most blurry phase of my life and bought meals from the restaurant on what seemed to me as the rare special occasion and once before the school year began. This would make me illogically obsessed with the idea of going back every September. As if not having done so meant unfinished family business or a sign of something misplaced in my little cycle of life. It become a part of my history, my family’s history too if you will.

When I took walks in the summer I often found myself spending extra hours just to visit the place I once called home. The driveway seemed much narrower than the one that remains in my collection of vague memories and different flowers had been planted in place of my favourite daffodils. But my family wasn’t there. Suddenly the hoarding of such memories and giving them great significance meant nothing. But that didn’t stop me from wanting to visit again or stop feeling an odd connection with the place. Walking by the elementary school near the home was a similar story. The hopscotch lines are now covered by the perfect, impeccable pavement. Even the tree I used to climb had been chopped down and thus, remains no evidence the memories I have hoarded over the past decade ever existed.

This isn’t a sad story though. Being too attached to the memories despite having the people who created them with me turned the spotlight away from more significant things that are currently forming me new memories (likely better).

Despite the old box of picture books being of little use today and my refusal to give them away because of the memories, there is no turning back to the time when I most enjoyed them. When I am reminded of the memories I hoarded for so many years, I see a person that lacked the optimism to face a better future ahead. Time is unforgiving and waits for no one.

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